As Stubborn As They Come

Posted on Thu Jul 24th, 2025 @ 1:24am by Lieutenant Didrea Zade & Lieutenant Ame Solis M.D.

Mission: Aeon's End
Location: Zade's Quarters?
Timeline: Pandora's Box MD8/Aeon's End MD1
3175 words - 6.4 OF Standard Post Measure

As ordered, Zade kept her duties light, thankful that she was finally able to leave sickbay and recover in her quarters. The black compression sleeve that Ame had given her to help support her still-sensitive thigh poked out from the bottom of the grey mid-length shorts, a fashion choice that made for ease of access during the regularly scheduled visits. Zade didn't mind the administrative work, it wasn't anything new to her, but it was the lack of freedom to move the way she wanted to that kept her infuriatingly antsy.

As such, she was on the couch, leg propped on the coffee table, reading a PADD containing the latest reports. The news of scientists missing due to some temporal rift was concerning, but she knew that if Kane needed any response from the security teams, Dash could handle the in-person response.

What was worse than a pilot who couldn’t fly? To Ame, it was a Chief of Security unable to be in the thick of things. Especially after injuries tied so closely to recent events. Keeping Zade confined to sickbay wasn’t beneficial; the lack of privacy there often hindered recovery, and Ame firmly believed a personal, familiar environment could make all the difference. In this instance, Zade had been sent back to her quarters and put on the lightest duties possible.

Still, traumatic injuries—no matter how trivial they might appear—were often the hardest for patients to overcome, and Ame didn’t take that lightly. She wanted to keep an eye on Zade personally, ensuring she didn’t feel forgotten or sidelined. So took it upon herself to pack up a light medical kit and stop by without warning. Standing outside Zade’s door, she tapped the control panel and drew a steadying breath before stepping into her role once again.

Hearing the chime, Zade looked up from the PADD and at the door. "It's open," she called out. Looking at the time on the PADD, she suspected it was the doctor for another scheduled visit.

The swoosh of the door revealed the Trill appropriately resting. Grey shorts would make things easier, but it wasn’t the physical injuries that bothered Ame the most. “Hey. Sorry it’s time for an invasion of privacy.” The Bajoran stepped inside and half smiled, “How are you feeling?” She found herself a seat within arms reach and waited for a hesitant update.

The suspicion was correct, so Zade sat up to clear some space. On the coffee table were a bunch of PADDs, mostly containing various reports from the last couple days. "Sorry for the mess." Perhaps slightly faster than expected, she turned off the PADD that was in her hand before setting it on the haphazard stack she made. "Aside from the continued frustration of mandated rest, I'm doing alright," she answered, a hint of lightheartedness in her tone.

“It’s fine. You’ve got clothes on and you’re not hitting on me. I can’t really ask for more than that.” Ame smiled faintly, “I know, I’m very, very annoying when mandating things.” In most instances, she would have offered to help but there was a need to gauge things. “Do you mind if I?” The tricorder flipped out and open before Zade could even acknowledge the request.

Zade gave a shrug at the request, knowing it was just procedure. "Go ahead." She could only imagine the type of checkups Ame's done to have 'clothed and professional' as a standard. "It's still a challenge to find a comfortable sleeping position, but not as bad as yesterday." The sleeve, while it provided necessary support, never quite sat comfortably when she was laying down. Combined with a reconstructed ribcage, there were very few positions that kept pressure off her injuries. At least light duty granted her the flexibility to rest as needed.

It didn’t take more than a moment for the scan to conclude, residual adrenaline, hypertension and increased muscle tension. Zade had already outed her lack of sleep which added to Ame’s list of concerns. “Things are healing nicely.” She started, “There are a few things I can offer to help with sleep. Some are the usual, and some aren’t. I can increase your pain meds on a night and top it up with something to help you sleep. If you want something a bit more … weird. I can look at using low gravity, it’d reduce the pressure and assist with sleep. But I guess that’s all dependant on you.” Her lips pressed together as she glanced about the rest of the room trying to look for any other signs of concern.

The state of the quarters suggested a minimalist lifestyle yielding to the subtle signs of degraration. Aside from the PADDs on the coffee table, the desk also contained some PADDs, a jacket and a blanket thrown over the back of the chair. Both the bedroom and bathroom doors were open, an unusual sight when the default state of the doors was meant to be closed. The bed wasn't made, hinting to a developing habit of rolling out of bed and immediately migrating to another part of the quarters.

Zade noticed Ame looking around and faintly tensed, rubbing her hands on her shorts. It was no secret between them, especially after a couple of Ame's routine visits, that the Trill usually had a routine she followed, and she knew that her quarters didn't look how they did when she was first released to quarters. "The pain is manageable," she answered, hoping to bring the attention back to the matter at hand, a physical checkup. Ame's presence was already an acknowledged invasion of privacy, but it provided an opportunity to satisfy the urge to prod, which was something the Trill hoped to avoid. "I can try the low gravity and see if it helps." The physical discomfort was only part of it; ever since she regained consciousness, she'd been having distorted dreams where her mind tried to piece together the events in the wreckage. More than once, she had awoken in a cold sweat because her imagination created impossible, yet jarring, scenarios.

Ame wasn’t too worried about the slight mess, that was normal for someone who was struggling to get around. The open doors itched the back of her mind, she’d seen that *somewhere* before. Psychology and the mind weren’t really her speciality but there were some things that she’d picked up from her preferred skillset. “Sure, I’ll make contact with engineering just to warn them that nothing is going awry.”

There was a tentative pause, “How about you, how are you holding up, in general? I’m not going to go full counsellor.” She admitted quietly, “It’s a lot to take in.”

"I'm fine," came the rather quick and defensive response. There was a brief pause before Zade sighed, knowing that she effectively outed her own lie. "Just... frustrated. I still don't remember everything that happened, and reading the reports just feels like reading someone else's story." Since her memories, or lack thereof, pertained to the concussion she sustained, it was probably in her best interest to mention it to Ame, but the Trill didn't have to like it.

The doctor’s brow couldn’t resist arching, she pushed herself back into the seat and crossed her legs at the knee, hand holding her ankle above her boot. “You have a massive concussion Zade. You have parts of your memory missing, it's like an out-of-body experience and that’s scary.” Ane pressed her lips together, “It’s going to be hard, and it's out of your control and mine. Savin might just be the best person for you to talk to, but I know that’s harder than it sounds.”

A soft contemplative sigh escaped the Bajoran’s lips, as she folded away the tricorder and returned it to her side. From her makeshift kit she pulled out a PADD and requested the gravity adjustment to be approved. “I will do anything I can to help you. We just need to work together.”

"I've already spoken to Savin. What I need is to be back to active duty," Zade grumbled, dismissing the offer to help. It wasn't a lie, Savin had visited her in sickbay and they did talk. The idea of talking to Savin about memories she couldn’t even remember, and how she felt about it... even if she wanted to, she wasn't ready. Her stubborn brain further reinforced this with the simple fact that they were still in the middle of a mission, and the mission had to come first. "Being able to work on tasks here has helped, but what will help more is getting back on my feet."

“What does active duty look like?” Ame asked honestly, she had no idea the depth of things Zade did, just the same, few could pin all of the complexities of what running Sickbay entailed. “It’s not your feet I’m worried about.” Her jaw tensed and she tapped out a further response to engineering on the PADD before returning it to the kit. Frustrations were building, and the pot was simmering almost at a boil.

As Zade thought to answer, she realized that a lot of her responsibilities were just desk work or the bridge shift. Whatever physical tasks she did could easily be handed off to someone else, she just liked being on the rotation for them because it let her stretch her legs. The fact that the department could handle such tasks in her absence meant that she was really just trying to find an excuse to feel useful. It made her stammer for a few seconds as she collected her thoughts. "Regular ship patrols, bridge duty, inventory..." She waved a hand, as if either trying to find the right word or trying to make stuff up. "Team morale, training. I know my team can handle these, I just-"

Pausing, Zade gently leaned back into the couch, letting a heavy sigh escape her as she stared at the ceiling. "I just don't feel like I'm doing enough," she quietly admitted. "I should be with my team, not... here. It's frustrating as hell to know that these raiders are still trying to get to the wreckage, that some of our people are missing, and all I can do is just sit here." Of course, some of that was her own self doubt talking, as she was still able to operate in an administrative capacity, but it was different when she was on the bridge, or even in her office.

Ame tilted her head slightly, her expression softening as she considered Zade's words. “I get it,” she said gently, leaning forward and resting her forearms on her knees. “It’s maddening to feel like you’re sitting on the sidelines while everything’s happening around you. But what you’re doing right now, letting yourself heal, is just as vital as being out there.”

She hesitated, weighing her words carefully. “Think of it like maintaining a starship. If something major’s damaged, you don’t just patch it up and send it out into battle again. You take the time to do the repairs properly, no matter how inconvenient it feels. Because if you don’t, the damage could spread, and the ship could end up worse off, or completely out of commission.”

Her gaze met Zade’s, steady and earnest. “That’s where you are right now. You’re still the Chief of Security, and you’re still leading your team. Just because you’re not physically with them doesn’t mean you’re not contributing. They know you’re recovering and need you to be at your best when you’re back. Let them take care of things for now—trust them the way they trust you.”

Ame sat back slightly. “And as for the memories… I know that feels like an uphill battle too. It’s disorienting, and it’s frustrating to read reports about something you lived through but can’t fully remember. But your brain’s doing its own kind of healing, even if it doesn’t feel like it. The pieces will come back when they’re ready, or they might not, and that’s okay too. It doesn’t define who you are or how well you can do your job.”

She let the words settle for a moment, “You’ll get back to active duty. But for now, it’s okay to let things take time. The mission doesn’t end just because you’re taking a different role in it.”

Zade let her words sink in, seeing the wisdom in her words. Ame was right, it wasn't like she was out of the fight for good, it was just her turn to provide support. "You're right. I can still be helpful in other ways," she agreed, taking care to find a replacement for the word useful. At least she was allowed to do some of her administrative work to feel like she was contributing, because the doctor easily could have said no and put her strictly on medical leave.

"But the memories... I need to know what happened. I need to remember for myself." Lifting her head from its support on the couch, she looked at Ame. There was a hint of something behind Zade's eyes, a drive to do whatever it took to get her memories back, but also a subtle thread of guilt woven in as well. "I'm not worried about remembering the exact events. I'm trained to handle it, even if it's bad. I... I don't want to feel this disconnected."

“Memories come back in pieces,” Ame said gently. “When you take a hit like that, everything locks down, it’s your brain’s way of protecting you. It’s frustrating, I know, especially when you can *feel* the missing pieces just out of reach.” She paused, searching Zade’s face. “But forcing it won’t help. If anything, it might just make it worse.”

She hesitated, remembering the way Zade had reacted to P’Rel’s questioning, the way the name had *shaken* her. That wasn’t just a missing memory. That was something deeper, something her mind wasn’t ready to touch yet. “I know this isn’t easy,” she continued, quieter now. “But you don’t have to do this alone. When you’re ready, we’ll figure it out together.”

The conversation was interrupted by the ship jolting. Instinctively, the Trill quickly moved to grab the doctor, and the two tumbled to the ground between the couch and the coffee table. Zade made sure she was on top of Ame, an arm over the doctor's head to protect her as the trembling continued for a few more seconds. She quietly groaned when the fall irritated the lingering injuries, gritting her teeth as the sound of a red alert accompanied the change in lighting. "You alright?" she asked Ame, sitting up to let her move.

The Bajoran blinked up at Zade, momentarily stunned by the cover that had been provided. The instinctive dive, the protective arm shielding her. It had all happened so fast. She wasn’t used to being on this end of a reflexive save, and the shock of the moment caught her off guard.

“I—yeah,” she managed, her voice steadier than she felt. “I’m fine. Thanks for that.” Her muddy green eyes flicked to Zade’s, scanning for any new signs of discomfort or strain, amid the disorienting rush of emotions and adrenaline. The weight of the Trill’s presence above her, her arm still braced protectively, made Ame acutely aware of the moment.

“Are you okay?” she asked, her tone softer now, tinged with concern. “That didn’t do your injuries any favours, did it?” Carefully Ame moved herself out from beneath Zade and scorched to her feet before offering a hand to the woman on the floor. “Let’s get you upright.”

Zade's head felt like it was pulsing with each beat of her now adrenaline-fueled heart. The bite of bruises that weren't there only seconds before could only be thanks to the unforgiving edge of the coffee table as she protected Ame. The urgency of a red alert and what felt like an attack on the ship de-prioritized her own injuries, shoving away the latter as a "worry about it later" afterthought. Accepting Ame's offered hand, Zade started to stand. "I think I'm ok, I need to... to..."

A rush of dizziness washed over her, and Zade half-collapsed into the couch cushion. No amount of stubborn compartmentalisation could override the pull of unconsciousness that threatened to consume her. Her ears began to ring with a tone that drowned out the jarring red alert noise. She couldn’t focus. Any effort to get her bearings resulted in nauseating blurred vision.

Ame pulled herself alongside the Trill and propped her up with a pillow from where she’d been sitting. “I know this is going to be hard, but I’m not a complete weed. I promise.” She reached for the kit that had been knocked over the floor pulling out a hypospray and some vials. “I don’t want to knock you out, but you really need to sleep. How about we get this gravity sorted and you try and rest?” Her hand moved to settle on Zade’s to give her something to hold onto. “You’re okay, I’m here with you.”

The doctor's words sounded muffled, and Zade blinked hard to try and get rid of the dark haze that lingered at the corners of her vision. The red alert klaxon had been silenced by now, leaving just the flashing lights that left red smears across her vision. "What's happening?" Zade mumbled, putting a hand to the side of her head. She closed her eyes to try and bear through the dizzying sensations, using Ame's support to keep her steady. "Dizzy... why does my head hurt?"

Ame’s gaze flicked toward the door, the flashing lights casting restless shadows across the walls. Whatever hit them had passed, but Zade was still struggling, her balance unsteady, her focus slipping in and out. “How about we take a little trip?” Ame murmured, her voice steady despite the adrenaline still humming through her veins. She shifted closer, offering her support. “Just lean on me. I’ve got you.”

It wasn't like objecting was much of a choice. Zade heard the call for a transport to sickbay and braced for the blinding light, but nothing happened. A gentle tug of the arm prompted Zade to slowly stand, keeping a hand on Ame's shoulder for support. She felt the Doctor's arm wrap arpund her waist, just in case, and the two shuffled out of her quarters and to sickbay.