Art & Science

Posted on Tue Jun 6th, 2023 @ 1:33pm by Commander Amaya Lance & Lieutenant Alexis Ryan

Mission: Wrath of the People
Location: Athena - Outside Engineering
Timeline: MD 07 (following 'Sensor Shadows')
1486 words - 3 OF Standard Post Measure

Amaya paused in the hallway, waiting for Lieutenant Ryan to join her. Naturally the Science Officer would need a few moments to confer with her team, which gave Amaya time to pause and think. Jumping into the conversation had produced mixed results; she had felt confident in approaching the group with her opinion, but hadn't considered that as their commanding officer she was also supposed to be the one giving out orders. Perhaps her approach wasn't what they were used to.

"Lieutenant," she nodded, taking in a breath as Alexis appeared. "Thank you for joining me. And...thank you for your conduct in there." She flicked her head back to the engineering room they had just come from. "I have to say, although I haven't been here long, it seems you are one of the few senior officers that don't seem a sentence away from trying to overrule my every word." She spoke lightly, tying to help Alexis understand that she wasn't complaining about the state of affairs; she understood, but making light of it might help the other woman understand her position more clearly.

Curiosity regarding the Commander's intent hadn't allowed for the simplicity of gratitude. Alex, caught off-guard by the sentiment, offered a faintly mystified smile and dipped her head to concede, "Consider it the benefit of not having been here long enough to get set in my ways, Commander." The Lieutenant hesitated, not out of a reluctance to speak her mind but simple due consideration for ensuring she phrased things correctly. "It's also an uncommon privilege to have a scientist's perspective offering guidance." Ryan tidied her mischief behind carefully controlled amusement. "It certainly saved time."

"Perspective is something that is overlooked far too often by impatient leaders," Amaya agreed. "If you don't mind me saying: you volunteered to lead one of the sub-sections of the ship back there, correct? From the notes in your file, it seemed like leadership wasn't something you were actively pursuing. Or was that another thing an impatient leader overlooked somewhere?"

Ryan didn't even try to disguise her resigned humour. At this point, she was starting to suspect her dossier was festooned with asterisk and some very heavy underlining under some parts. "I'm aware that my service record has a lot to say about leadership potential and my insistence on dodging out of its way." Surely, at this point, she could view it as a contest for the most amount of recommendations not acted on. "Though it's heartening to hear that Captain Kane took my current stance seriously." Alex regarded the other woman for a moment, consideration perhaps for the aptness of her next words, and then explained, "Starfleet has shuffled me as high as Departmental Head finally. Eventually, I'm sure it will get its way and push me higher. I have been fortunate to be led by those who have faith in me but I'm not sure their attempts to catapult me away from my specialisation would have been in anyone's best interest." Alex smiled. "Certainly not my own."

"Once upon I time I would have said the same thing," Amaya reflected. "My first Captain encouraged me to take a step into the unknown - after all, that's what we scientists do, isn't it? Stepping into the unknown. Finding new paths." That had been a very long time ago for her. A lot had happened since. A few mis-steps. "I won't force you to do something you're not keen on. But I can encourage it; take this opportunity to lead. See if it fits you or not."

The advice earned the Commander a circumspect shrug, though it was not an expression of disinterest. "If current overtures are reliable, my days of hiding behind new innovations in the hope that nobody will notice me are probably numbered." There was no small amount of irony in this reflection, that someone with her background might one day be considered suitable for a command of her own. Given recent attempts to bring her past into play once again, Alexis frowned where she might normally not even have thought to make comparison, and switched the subject deftly. "Athena has a Science team who have been underestimated for long enough. This mission may be more than just my opportunity to step into the noose."

"Not a noose," Amaya said, a little frown on her face. "This ship might have been designed for 'tactical escort' or however they like to dress it up these days, but at the end of the day Starfleet was always intended to be set up for exploration and discovery." A faint smile drew itself on her lips, pushing away the negativity with a strangely humble and longing expression. "If someone like me can make it, then for you the sky's the limit."

Alex's eyebrows lifted slightly. "Your career is not without its own highlights, sir," she eventually replied, generous in recollection of the woman's earlier hesitation. Faltered assertiveness was perhaps understandable in high pressure situations but it wasn't something Ryan was used to dealing with in her superior officers.

"Oh, I'm sure. Just a shame people read the less flattering headlines." Amaya's eyes fell to the ground momentarily. "Some of them not without justification." She forced a composed look back onto her face, fingers tightening round into a fist in advance of any sort of twitch. "Make sure your successes outweigh your failings, Lieutenant. That's my advice."

This time, Alex failed to keep the glint of amusement from her eyes, though she did her best to control her composure. "Sound advice," she instead replied, and couldn't resist adding, "Applicable to a great many situations, I should think." Her humour erred on the side of kindness, however, since the rather redundant nature of the remark did tend to suggest the Commander was struggling with expressing herself yet again. Alex got the feeling there was more to Lance's decision to hold her back for a private discussion and it probably didn't equate to stating the exceedingly obvious. "Public perception is not always the easiest to sway, though." Ryan paused and, seeing it as an opportunity to demonstrate empathy, added, "Certainly not when Starfleet-appointed prosecutors try to paint you as a terrorist for a situation you wound up in as a child." The Lieutenant lifted a shoulder in a wry hunch. "You're not the only one being chased by a legacy nobody will let you live down."

Amaya looked up, a little surprised at the notion of empathy that was being reflected back. And a genuine one, at that. It was rare that people treated her that way. And having felt the need to guide Ryan to avoid the mistakes she herself had made, it seemed like the other woman was holding up the mirror and letting Amaya hear some of that too.

"Thank you." A simple, quiet note of gratitude that was far more earnest than anything else she had said so far. "I wish everyone felt the same."

It was rare, and she never sought to deny it, for Alex to open up easily. From a very pragmatic point of view, she was quite open with facts and details, but the emotional revelations that sat behind them were usually closely guarded secrets. She resonated strongly with Lance's situation, however, despite by no means being an expert on the woman's rise and fall and slowly-regained footing. To explain why would involve delving into a past that she mostly tried to leave in its place but this was a delicate mission and they would need the Commander to step up. Confidence came, Alex had always found, from camaraderie.

"Someone once told me," she started, "at a time when I definitely needed to hear it, that if other people have a higher opinion of you than you have of yourself, then they have no business being so generous." The Lieutenant scoffed in amusement. "She wasn't a particularly warm and comforting confidant but she believed that self-advocacy was everyone's responsibility. And I do have to admit, things did improve once I stopped trying to change what other people thought of me and took control over how I thought about myself."

In her mind, Amaya flashed back momentarily to her time working with Cadets, guiding them through crisis response and dealing with pressured situations. One of them stood out in her mind; a Cadet Collins, who in spite of wanting to go down a command track, still needed to understand just how to lead without being so worried about what other people thought of him.

"None of us are ever too old to learn," Amaya reflected. "Look after one-third of the Athena for me, won't you Lieutenant?"

Smiling properly, Ryan dipped her head in acknowledgement. "I'll do my best to bring her home without a scratch." The Lieutenant paused and then reflected, "Or at least nothing that won't buff out."