The Storm...
Posted on Wed Aug 10th, 2022 @ 10:02pm by Lieutenant Commander Finnley Keating VII & Lieutenant Commander P’rel M.D
Mission:
Shore Leave
Location: Main Engineering
Timeline: MD03
1955 words - 3.9 OF Standard Post Measure
As the doors to main engineering closed behind her, P'rel looked around both levels for Keating. Engineering certainly seemed busier than she'd expected it to be, though she'd almost never been in the room, it seemed there was a much greater urgency in the voices and movements of the crew than she would have anticipated. Seeing Keating near the core talking to another engineer, the Vulcan made her way over with a PADD in hand. Their journey back to Athena with Admiral White had been a relatively groundbreaking one in their relationship, with both women seemingly having found more understanding for the other.
"Commander..." she said, gaining Keating's attention and surprising herself that calling Keating by her new rank, when she had only last year made such a point about the engineer being a junior lieutenant, didn't actually bristle the Vulcan at all.
On her part, Finn still almost cringed every time she heard the word 'commander' associated with her name. Any time she thought about it, the only thing that surfaced was the horrific memories that precedented the rank and how nothing in that experience had made her deserving of it. "Lieutenant P'rel," Finn half smiled as the Vulcan approached. At least the feeling of dread no longer accompanied the ice queen's presence. "What can I do for you?"
Handing the PADD to Keating, she motioned her head for the engineer to follow her. The two walked off to a quieter corner of engineering near to the door to a Jeffries tube junction. "These are classified. You understand nobody can have sight of this but you...?" She asked, though didn't wait for an answer, knowing that Keating would be fully on board. "Sector has provided me with technical data of the Avalon. In order for the new sensor suite to work, it requires pulling a lot of power from the only other large-power system on board - the engines." P'rel looked over Keating's shoulder to an engineer who was paying a little too much falteringly discreet attention to the conversation; with a stern look he hurried off back to his task. "Essentially Avalon can only use the array whilst sat still..." She looked at Keating's face, making sure she was still with her. P'rel couldn't help but notice she seemed somewhat distracted however. "Commander?".
"Huh?" Finn snapped out of her trance. Though she had previously been lost in the nightmare of her time in the cells, she had heard the basics. "Yea, I got it. No one else can see this. You need power, from the engines." She piecemealed back what the intelligence officer had said. "We can funnel energy from tertiary engineering now that Ben is gone."
P'rel furrowed her brow with concern. Keating hadn't heard her at all and that was a worry. "No Commander, the Avalon; the Avalon takes power from engines to operate their prototype sensor array..." she studied the young woman's face. Though she needed to complete her briefing to Keating, it was of little logical use if the Chief wasn't able to follow her words. "Are you alright...?" she asked, both out of a genuine concern for the person, and for the mission.
"Sorry, yea I'm fine. I'm following now. The Avalon uses power from its engines to work the sensors," Finn stood up straight as if refocusing on the topic at hand. "You said she can only use the array whilst she's still?" She repeated, hoping that she'd gotten it correctly this time. The last thing she needed was someone else thinking she couldn't handle whatever it was she was going through. "We might be able to use that to find her."
As a brow involuntarily arched, P'rel only said "Indeed..." in a tone which quite clearly relayed her confusion, as that was precisely why she had come to Keating in the first place.... "Without the full energy dampening and plasma exhaust suppression systems operating, there is a very slight localised spike in a tertiary EM band. Sensors wouldn't register it as anomalous beyond normal ranges of background radiation, but the PADD contains the precise frequency in the band. Perhaps yourself and Lieutenant Ryan can utilise the data to find Avalon?". She eyed Keating, making sure that her facial expression didn't wander off again into distraction.
"That should work. I'll put Paxton on it," she replied. In truth, Finn hadn't planned to be on duty too much longer. She had the whole team working on updates and personally, she was tying off some last upgrades to the engines. Her next stop was the captain's office. To resign. "Was there anything else?" She asked, still slightly distracted but doing her best not to let on.
"Sigma 6 and above only..." P'rel countered. "Sorry. It has to be you. Paxton isn't cleared. This is far too sensitive to pass over. The frequency spike is virtually imperceptible, and you'd never notice it unless you actively scanning that one frequency amongst the countless others." Keating looked ill, like she was ready to collapse practically. "But as I said, Lieutenant Ryan...?". Her concern for Keating grew, the woman she'd come to know more over the past weeks was clearly not herself.
Finn sighed, refusing to make eye contact with the intelligence officer. All she could really think about is how everything was a mess because of her and she didn't need to complicate matters by staying any longer. What if she screwed this up too? "It's really better off in Paxton's hands, but if we can't get him clearance then I'll work with Ryan."
"Whilst Captain Kane can grant promotions and by default the necessary clearances for that rank, only I can dispense clearances directly". She crossed her arms. "Mister Paxton has no need for clearance and I must insist you only liaise with Lieutenant Ryan..." her voice suddenly switched to a more pointed, provocative tone, to try and get out of Keating whatever it was that was clearly wrong. "Unless there is a reason not to entrust you with this work?".
"I'll work with Lieutenant Ryan and get it sorted," the engineer replied begrudgingly. At least she could get the project started and then leave it in Ryan's hands. It might mean staying on duty for an extra day, but it seemed the only option she had available at this point. "Was there anything else?" She asked the intelligence officer, becoming eager to shrug off her company.
P'rel continued to study Keating's face; there was far more than she was letting on. "Yes..." she began, taking a single step closer so her mouth was next to Keating's ear; "Radical situations and experiences do not require radical decisions to remedy...they require logic and rationalism...".
"What makes you think I've made any illogical decisions?" Finn shot back. Surely the Vulcan couldn't read her mind and besides, her future action was based on nothing but logic and rationalism. It was the only reasonable solution to keeping everyone else safe.
"Commander..." P'rel began, her voice dropped to barely a whisper to prevent any of the bustling crowd overhearing. "Finnley..." she amended before continuing, "...your emotionally volatile demeanour alone is sufficient confirmation of your heightened state of chaos...". She looked around over Keating's shoulder again, as if warding off anyone who might be listening in; "it is human nature, and if I may say so a distinct quality of yours, to make substantial decisions to better one's circumstances. Do not mistake me; these are signs of good leaders, and of good people, however when the constituent parts of those decisions are emotions alone devoid of logic, one rarely makes the best choices...". P'rel looked Keating straight in the eye, as was her way when forcing a point, "I sense that Rondac has affected you far more than you are willing to concede...and that you are soon to make a significant decision in an effort to bring some order to your chaos. Am I right?".
Finn looked around and then motioned toward her office, if she was going to have this conversation then she didn't need the engineers listening in. Once inside, she whirled around to face the Vulcan. "If you must know, I plan to submit my resignation at the end of my shift," Finn held up a hand before P'rel could say anything. "I've thought it through and it's the only logical choice. If I wasn't in Starfleet, my clone couldn't have done so much damage and Silnan might even still be alive. My presence only harms everyone else. It's not worth it and nothing you can say will change my mind. You don't know what happened in that cell. If you did, you'd want my resignation too."
Nodding slowly and silently, Keating had confirmed P'rel's approximate suspicions. "Perhaps you can share that information with me, and in doing so unburden yourself of this emotional distress" she suggested, as if it were just as simple as that. She had no idea whether Keating had fully divulged what happened on Rondac to anyone, Counsellor Savin perhaps, and she had persistently suspected that far more had happened than what she had been told. There was just no logic for the engineer to throw everything away for something which could not be changed.
She nodded slowly. Finn had promised herself that she would share the details with the Vulcan at some point and although she didn't really want to, Finn knew that P'rel deserved to see the truth of what happened to Silnan. "I...I don't know that I...can talk through the whole thing, but I'll do my best. You deserve to know what I did to him," Finn's head dropped as she tried to collect her thoughts and memories.
"You did nothing to him" P'rel responded, wondering what exactly Keating meant but also being quite certain that she hadn't actually hurt the young man. "Perhaps..." she began, "...perhaps there is a more efficacious method to this. Without talking. I could perform a direct mind meld, and share your memories, and whilst doing so I would be able to share with you, some techniques to facilitate calmness, emotional control, and logical insight; whilst also conveying sufficient proficiency to use those techniques independently". Pausing for just a moment, P'rel continued; "As I conveyed in the Captain's office; Starfleet requires future leaders such as yourself. It would be illogical to deprive the service of such a resource, only to satisfy your emotional indulgences...".
Finn took a deep breath. Surely P'rel would come to regard her as a monster as well if she let lose free reign of her more recent memories. However, she knew that it was the only way for P'rel to truly know what had happened on that planet and she deserved to know that much at least. Finn nodded hesitantly and looked at the intelligence officer. "How do we start then?"
"I must prepare for such an intimate meld, this is far in excess of what we accomplished on the shuttle. I would invite you to a holodeck. One hour should suffice. Humans often find the experience....intense....I suggest you drink plenty of water prior to the meld." P'rel, somewhat unsure of the appropriate emotional mechanisms required in the situation, awkwardly took hold of Keating's upper arm and squeezed it.
Finn nodded in response and although her emotions were in general upheaval, the attempted show of support via an arm squeeze was almost enough to make her chuckle. Instead, she just watched the Vulcan disappear from her office before replicating a bottle of water and sitting at her desk. She had one hour to attempt to organize her thoughts of the past and she would make the best of it.